“Can texting be used to seduce?”
This is a question that I am asked on numerous occasions by students, and my answer is that it’s what you do in the interaction that is important, and that’s what she will remember.
The fact is that all interactions are unique, and in some cases you may have had the opportunity to make a really good connection with a girl, and she is subsequently keen to see you again. In this case whether you call or what you text is not really important, as you’ll probably be able to see her again without too much difficulty.
However, if you didn’t manage to make the interaction as intense as you would have liked, or just didn’t have time to follow through into the seductive phase of the inteaction, then how you text message her can be quite important. It can certainly be frustrating to number close a hot girl, and then not know how to carry things on in the smoothest way possible. If you call her, you’re putting both yourself and her on the spot to have a conversation which won’t be that easy if you haven’t yet connected that well. However, some people really like to call, and feel that it’s assertive, and gives the opportunity to further build comfort.
My advice would be to do what feels natural. If you’ve met a girl who was really chatty, and seemed into you, then call her. If you met a girl who was a bit more aloof and had a few more barriers up, then you might need to ellicit some interest from her using texts before she agrees to see you.
It reminds me of a situaion that I went through early on in my PU days. I had gone on a date with a smoking hot girl, which my inner AFC was telling me was way out of my league. Despite being nervous, I managed to appear confident, and the date went well, with a kiss at the end of it. I thought that having kissed her, and having got on well, the second date would be easy, but it wasn’t that simple. Little did I know at the time, but I was getting involved with a serious game player. I was still naieve to how well callibrated girls are when it comes to flirting and relationships, and would often be totally honest in my replies, unaware that I was being tested.
She didn’t take calls, and would only text (she never explained why). So after our first successful date I sent her a text asking her out again, and she basically sent me an abrupt text telling me she was busy, and that she would let me know when she was free.
‘She doesn’t want to see me again! What have I done?!’ screamed my inner AFC.
The fact was, I hadn’t done anything wrong perse. I was just letting her take control of the interaction. Looking back, she knew exactly what she was doing, and was testing me for social proof, and basically encouraging me to chase her. However chasing after her would have made her loose interest, as that would lowered my value and would have been needy, AFC behavour. Confusing? A little, but PU is not usually this complicated, I promise!
Fortunately at this time I was in close contact with a number of London MPUAs who were only too happy to give a grateful chump like me some much needed advice of how to deal with a girl like this.
Where as once my texts would have ALWAYS involved a question, because I desperate for a response so I could keep the interaction going, they advised me to do the following: Wait a few hours before responding, don’t always be readily available to meet up, and instead of asking questions, to simply send statements coupled with DHVs, e.g. mentioning which club I was going to, or what me and my friends were up to.
Whilst I hate doing things like this, such as waiting to reply purely for the sake of it, it is an unfortunate necessity when you have just met someone at adultfrinendfinder. I strive to be honest as a PUA, but this is just sometimes not that easy to do. Put simply, if a girl is really hot, and you really want to see her again, telling her exaclty how you feel is going to come across as too forward, and too direct. You have to play it cool, and try and be aloof, even though you might really like her and want to see her again as soon as possible.
It’s amazing how often a girl will start chasing you, if you just hold back a bit and stop chasing her and asking her questions.
I like to be as natural as possible, but before I learnt game I left myself vulnerable to being played, and basically failed every shit test put my way. I was ALWAYS available for them, would reply to any text they sent IMMEIDATELY, and if I didn’t manage to do so, I would apologize for my late reply, and I would always be the one persistently asking them out.
If a girl has asked you out, and you’re going out with friends that night, then tell her you can’t meet, and let her know why. It will only increase her desire to meet with you. If she has texted you what you’re up to, then don’t reply immediately, and leave it a while until you do text her. If you do this, every time she recieves a text from someone, she will hope that it will be you who’s replying. The longer you leave it, the more grateful she will be when you finally do get in touch.
If you do come across a girl who seems to be playing games, then you’re going to have to up yours, and get her to do a little bit of work to see you. Put simply:
‘Don’t play a player.’